Exasperated, the therapist finally suggests that she could stop writing. “Stop?” says the writer, blinking in surprise.
~ Mandy Brown, from A battle with the gods
The challenge is to realize that the error I’m making is in thinking the writing part sucks. Of course it’s not easy— that’s what makes it fun. (Is the lesson I need to continue to work to internalize.)
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I didn’t set out to collect quotes. I simply wanted to randomly be inspired, or challenged to think, by things others have said or written.
…and 30 years later, I now get a little email from my past self every day. No noise. Just a quote.
https://littleboxofquotes.com/
In 1994 I began collecting inspirational quotes, displaying them randomly on my personal blog. After a few years I copied them all onto 3×5 cards. I put them in a small box and continued to add cards. Today, there are more than 1,500 quotes and the collection continues to grow.
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Gratitude is like the good faith of traders—it maintains commerce; And we often pay, not because it is just to discharge our debts, but that we may more readily find people to trust us.
~ Rochefoucauld
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[It] boils down to a simple breathing exercise. First, exhale completely, then inhale a deep breath. Wait 10 seconds, then—without exhaling—inhale a little more. Wait another five seconds, then top up the breath again. Finally, exhale.
~ Uri Bram from, The Cure for Hiccups Exists
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Sometimes I straight-up do public service announcements. Here, have a cure for hiccups!
If you’ve thought about how proper breathing works, you’ll quickly realize those instructions involve incrementally, increasingly flexing your diaphragm muscle. (If that isn’t obvious, the Thoracic diaphragm page on Wikipedia has you covered.) The muscle spasm is part of a feedback loop involving two of our nerves, and intentionally activating the muscle breaks that feedback. The trick is that you need to really flex it… flex it much harder than you normally do when breathing.
Note that if you do the “hold your breath” part of the exercise by closing your glottis (what’s that?) and relaxing your diaphragm, you’re doing it wrong. The entire point of the exercise is to flex, flex, flex and hold tension in the diaphragm muscle.
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How can podcasting and creative practices enhance personal growth, connection, and professional development?
The practice of mindful creative work transforms personal and professional growth.
Podcasting, for me, seemed […] is a much more enabling platform than asking someone for a cup of coffee. It allows you to go deep into conversations because it’s a more exploratory kind of a medium.
~ Saurabh Mithal (2:28)
The conversation discusses the transformative potential of podcasting as a medium for personal and professional growth. Saurabh highlights how podcasting fosters connections by facilitating meaningful conversations and enabling creative exploration. He explains how this medium provides a platform for community building and encourages a growth mindset in various aspects of life.
Another key topic is the impact of shifting creative practices from private (e.g., morning pages) to public (e.g., dailies), which increases mindfulness, empathy, and the quality of the output. The dialogue also touches on the importance of intentionality in interactions, the concept of anti-fragility in careers, and the role of curiosity as a self-sustaining force for continuous learning and growth.
Takeaways
The importance of fostering genuine connections — Podcasting offers a unique way to form deeper connections with others.
The concept of anti-fragile careers — Designing a career that thrives in uncertainty requires consistent creativity, learning, and connection.
The shift from private to public creative practices — Moving creative work into the public sphere enhances its quality and mindfulness.
The role of curiosity — Being passionately curious drives both personal and professional growth.
The impact of recorded conversations — Knowing that a conversation will be recorded and shared raises its quality and depth.
The value of calling out rationalizations — Encouraging people to face their real priorities helps them achieve their goals.
Generosity in creative work — Mindful creation generates value for all participants and audiences.
The interplay of mindfulness and creativity — Awareness of the purpose and context of creative work enhances its effectiveness.
Resources
Passionately Curious — Saurabh’s platform for helping individuals build careers centered around their individuality.
The Akimbo Community — A network of creatives and learners connected through Seth Godin’s workshops.
Seth Godin’s Creative Workshop — A course focused on daily creative practices, such as dailies.
Morning Pages — From The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron), a tool for unfiltered, private creative writing.
(Written with help from Chat-GPT.)
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How can individuals approach conversations more effectively to foster understanding, manage conflict, and overcome fear?
The illusion of control deeply influences how we approach conversations and conflict.
People really like the idea of control, and I think a lot of things we do in our lives are to live under the illusion of control.
~ Sam Ardery (1:16)
This conversation explores the nature of control, fear, and personal accountability in conversations and conflict resolution. A central theme is the illusion of control and how it shapes our responses to unexpected situations. Techniques such as the “P-A-R-C” framework—pause, assess, reflect, and choose—offer practical tools for navigating conversations more thoughtfully.
Other significant topics include the role of compassion and self-compassion, particularly in the context of conflict and personal growth. The discussion emphasizes the importance of understanding one’s own role in disputes, highlighted by the idea of “accepting your 5%.” Additionally, the fear of rejection and failure is dissected, with insights into how embracing these fears can lead to greater resilience and better outcomes in personal and professional interactions.
Takeaways
The illusion of control — People often act under the false belief that they can control outcomes, which influences how they handle conflict and conversations.
The “P-A-R-C” framework — A method to pause, assess, reflect, and choose, providing a structured approach to challenging interactions.
Self-compassion as a foundation — Recognizing and practicing self-compassion is essential for genuinely empathizing with others.
Radical listening — Listening without agenda and being open to the possibility of being wrong is critical for meaningful dialogue.
Accepting responsibility — Taking accountability for one’s share of the conflict, even if small, can shift the dynamics of disputes.
Fear of rejection — Overcoming the fear of rejection is crucial for effective outreach and building connections.
Discomfort in growth — Embracing discomfort as a natural part of personal and relational development leads to lasting growth.
The dichotomy of control — Separating what one can control from external circumstances helps manage expectations and reduces anxiety.
Resources
Sam Ardery’s website — Features writings and resources on mediation, negotiation, and personal growth.
Positively Conflicted — Sam’s book exploring conflict resolution and personal development through practical stories and frameworks.
(Written with help from Chat-GPT.)
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I wake up each day with the firm conviction that I am nowhere near my full potential. ‘Greatness’ is a verb. I have miles to go before I sleep, and so I will spend my remaining years desperately looking to improve who I am from year to year. Greatness is not a final destination, but a series of small acts done daily in order to constantly rejuvenate and refresh our skills in a daily effort to become a better version of ourselves.
~ Maurice Ashley
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TRANQUILLITY — “Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.” ~ Benjamin Franklin
We’re in our final week together. The first week was about creating space. 2 minutes: Pause life. Read. Think. Resume life.
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Arrived in the middle? Visit the first post, Where to begin?
(The entire series is available to download as a PDF ebook.)
As addicting as it is, desire is the enemy to proper time management. Poor sleeping habits, unhealthy lifestyle choices, and just plain dissatisfaction are all byproducts of a poorly managed life.
~ Ryan Holiday from, 5 Stoic Lessons On Time Management
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Time management is the only thing—the only major skill critical for leading a good life… Time management is the only thing which no one ever attempted to teach me explicitly. Everything else was covered to some degree: science, religion, morality, philosophy, work ethic, hygiene, sexuality, language, geography, personal finance, and more, depending on how you want to subdivide all the stuff in my head.
Time management isn’t the most critical thing to know. Language and critical thinking are the top two, because with those two and sufficient time you can bootstrap everything else. However, things would be far better for everyone, if the third item on the list of must-have skills to be Human was a basic grasp of Time Management.
For me, I was trying to fix my sleep when it became obvious that I needed to arrange my day around sleeping. That lead immediately to an entirely new need for time management. “I need to be at work by 8,” is not Time Management (with capitals.) I then took a circuitous route discovering the needs and methods of Time Management.
But where do I wish I had actually started? That’s an excellent question. Right around 18 years old, I wish someone had handed me a copy of this tiny book: How to Live on 24 Hours a Day by A Bennet.
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The mostly eclipsed solar disk is in the middle of this photo– just a bit above the center. Normally, at this stage of the eclipse, the partly exposed solar disk would cause retina damage if you look at it directly. But thanks to this cloud… ok, fine, yes, clouds don’t block UV light so looking at this is a BAD idea. I looked quickly. A few times. It was TOTALLY worth it. Here, you can look all you want, but you might need to zoom in a bit…
The entire eclipse was very “busy”. It was clear, then some clouds, then clear, a cloud… the viewing conditions changed second-by-second. Truly a rare event to see.
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(Part 3 of 13 in series, Scaf 101)
This is the set:
4 feet (8 feet if you made all the ones I suggested)
4 side out elbows (lower group of clamps in the photo)
4 double socket tees (middle group)
4 45° single socket tees (8 if you bought the extras I mentioned)
4 7-foot pipes
4 5-foot pipes
6 3-foot pipes
4 1-foot pipes
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(Part 2 of 13 in series, Scaf 101)
You need about $450 for everything in the set I’m describing in this series. You’ll need a bit more if you need all the tools, and want to make the wooden “feet” too. …or a smidge less if you have the tools already and skip the feet. (But I suggest you build the feet too. You’ll be happier down the road.)
You need only 12 clamps for this set. They’re pictured below, left-to-right.
4 of Kee Safety Klamp 20-7 – “Side Outlet Elbow”, Size 7 aka 1-1/4″ Dia. $17.50 each
4 of Kee Safety Klamp 21-7 – “90 Degree Two Socket Tee”, Size 7 / 1-1/4″ Dia. $14.00 each
4 of Kee Safety Klamp 12-7 – “45 Degree Single Socket Tee”, Size 7 / 1-1/4″ Dia. $15.75 each
The best place I’ve ever found for clamps is Global Industrial. Here’s the link to the Kee Safety family of clamps:
Currently, you have to choose brand “Kee” and then choose pipe size “1-1/4” to narrow the page down to showing just the clamps you want. The 12 clamps listed above are $170 (circa Feb 2016). When they add tax and shipping, the total comes to just under $200.
Skip to the exciting part: No don’t. But I will say, if you have just a little extra money — about $65 more — buy four additional 45° single socket tees. Way down the road, in the later builds, I’ll mention, “Hey, you’ll notice you have some 1-foot pieces you’re not using in this build! If you have those extra 45°, add a brace here…”
7 pieces of 10 foot, galvanized steel pipe, size 1-1/4″, ~$220.
(The “breakdown list” is further down explaining the lengths to cut it into.)
Pro-tip: Steel pipe is dirty, and the threaded ends have grease on them. Don’t expect to simply toss this stuff in your car. Almost all of it will fit in a trunk, but the 7′ long pieces may give you trouble.
When I first bought this pipe it was about $23, then it was $27, and most recently $29. Since this pipe is just standard schedule 40 pipe, you can call around and price shop. But remember, you need someone to cut it for you, or you have to do a LOT of hacksawing. You definitely CAN get a better per-foot cost, but you may have to buy “bundles” of pipe. As a bonus, it won’t have any threads on it. But the pipe will be longer than 10-feet lengths, and probably delivered as “freight” by a truck. Again, the whole point of this series is to get you started on the cheap. So just buying 7 pipes from Depot is the way to go. (But don’t take my word for it, call around.)
Home Depot will cut the pipe for you. The pipe is sold with threaded ends. (They receive it that way. They don’t sell it without the threaded ends.) They charge $1 to cut the pipe AND put threads on the ends. Depending on the employee, they may cut the pipe for free (since threading the ends is the tedious part). But, if they charge you $11 for the eleven cuts (see below), be happy. $11 is WAY better than hacksawing steel pipe.
One last note about cutting the pipe. If you have Depot do it, they use a machine that grabs the pipe and spins it (it makes sense when you see it done.) The machine leaves a few little marks in the pipe. You can feel them, but they’re harmless.
You need an 8mm Allen wrench. You’ll be happier if you have more than one because your new scaf set means you’re going to have new friends who you can put to work. Does this really need explaining? …fine, here’s a photo of a hand model holding a wrench:
See that neck on the end of the wrench? That allows you to insert the wrench on a slight angle and spin it quickly with your fingers. Really handy to keep the upper L-bend from swinging into pipe/clamps — you’ll discover that happens ALL THE TIME, and is why people use rachet wrenches after a while of this. Seriously Craig? You took a photo of the angled Allen wrench? Yeup:
You can use a regular wrench as pictured, which has the advantage of keeping you from over-tightening the screws. The downside of this little wrench is you have to work pretty hard and it’s tedious to use.
Euphamism alert! The screws cut little pairs of curves into the pipes, making the scaf pipe look less sexy. The light marks (shown below) from reasonably tight screws I like to call “set screw kisses”, and the really deep gouges — that can sometimes cut your hand (none shown below) — from really tightened screws, I like to call “set screw hickies”. Yes, I’m a simple creature, easily amused.
Alternatively, you can buy the Allen driver to fit into a standard ratchet wrench if you already have one of those sets. The 8mm socket attachment should come as a 3/8″ drive socket – meaning it fits the “medium” sized driver. (Some people also buy the 3/8″-to-1/2″ drive socket adapter so they can put the 3/8″ drive socket onto the large, 1/2″ drive handle.)
One last word about those set screw “kiss” marks: On the ends of the pipes, it’s not that big of a deal. The pipes will almost always be hidden inside clamps. But some of the clamps you will be positioning in the middle of the pipes. If you tighten the screws really hard, you make deep marks in parts of the pipe that you WILL be later stepping or grabbing. Experienced scaffers (did I just invent a word?) are more gentle on mid-pipe clamps, returning to snug them later, rather than tightening the daylights out of them immediately.
You need to make the following cuts. The employee at Depot is unlikely to appreciate the four, one-foot cuts. I recommend smiling, being polite and asking nicely. :)
Cut 2 pipes in half (i.e. at 5 feet.)
Cut 4 pipes at 7 feet.
Cut 1 pipe into 4 one-foot pieces, and 2 three-foot pieces.
You’ll end up with 18 pieces of pipe:
4 x 7′
4 x 5′
6 x 3′
4 x 1′
R&D digression: A bit about how I came up with this set: I have PILES of scaf and clamps. What I did was come up with small sets of parts and then figure out what I could build. I kept adding/removing/changing the pipe/clamp combinations to see what could be built. I also kept in mind that starters have to buy 10′ pipes; doesn’t make sense to go, “oh, we need just one more 4-foot piece” when they then have a 6-foot “extra”. So it’s a balance of cost, what you can cut from 10-foot pieces and how many clamps are needed. Way WAY at the end of this series I’ll mention a few places where having a few more 45-single outlets would let them add some bracing in the setups where they are not using the little 1-foot pieces. You can toss a little 1-foot angle brace in almost anywhere and it makes for bomber builds. I digress.
I bought a pressure treated 2×4 and made feet for the scaf. If you’re setting it up on concrete, the pipe WILL dig up the concrete when you have it set up certain ways. (The “A” frames for laché, the “railing” setup where the pipe ends rest on the ground, etc.) If you have these feet, you can just set the pipe ends in the feet.
Mark out 8, 10-inch cuts on the 2×4. Use a 1-3/4″ (or whatever) hole saw to drill through 4 of the pieces. Then cut the 2×4 into pieces and screw them together. Viola!
Pro-tip: If you’re making feet, make more than 4 because the 2×4 is plenty long. You’ll use the feet down the road when you have more scaf. A lot of scaf designs I see have clamps and pipes right down on the ground to avoid the naked pipe ends resting on the floor/ground. Well, if you have feet for those pipe ends, you have a whole range of options where you move the pipes up from ground level (changing clamps of course) to give you more intermediate bar options. It will all makes sense once you are fully addicted to Pipe Culture. Anyway, if you want to go full out, make 8 feet (mark 16 10-inch pieces, drill through 8 of them) and you’ll use them on my last example setup.
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In the fall of 2014, Tracy and I went to Boston for a Parkour event and added on a few extra days to visit family. Time well spent! Family, gorgeous sunny brisk weather, and then some New England clam chowda’!
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No man is more unhappy than he who never faces adversity. For he is not permitted to prove himself.
~ Seneca
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