Happiest day in seven years. And what did it take to achieve that? It took 10 seconds of secretly wishing for 2 other people to be happy for 8 repetitions, a total of 80 seconds of thinking. That, my friends, is the awesome power of loving-kindness.
Storms make us stronger. If I had one message for young people embarking on life, it would be this. Don’t shy away from the hard times. Tackle them head-on, move toward the path less trodden, riddled with obstacles, because most other people run at the first sign of battle. The storms give us a chance to define ourselves, to distinguish ourselves, and we always emerge from them stronger. The other key is to be kind along the way. Kindness matters so much on that journey of endeavor. It is what separates the good from great.
I respect kindness in human beings first of all, and kindness to animals. I don’t respect the law; I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.
For 57 words, that does a pretty good job of summing it up. “Kindness” covers all of my political beliefs. No need to spell them out. I believe that if, at the end of it all, according to our abilities, we have done something to make others a little happier, and something to make ourselves a little happier, that is about the best we can do. To make others less happy is a crime. To make ourselves unhappy is where all crime starts. We must try to contribute joy to the world. That is true no matter what our problems, our health, our circumstances. We must try. I didn’t always know this, and am happy I lived long enough to find it out.
I believe we are meaning-seeking creatures, and these feelings of meaning, relational and connective, are almost always located within kindness. Kindness is the force that draws us together, and this, Beau, is what I think I am trying to say – that despite our collective state of loss, and our potential for evil, there exists a great network of goodness, knitted together by countless everyday human kindnesses.
I’m lately fascinated by the distinction between when I’m using an activity as a part of my identity (“I am a runner”) versus pointing out that I do an activity (“I run”). This sort of nit matters to me, because the nature of self-identity matters to me. If I am a runner, but then for whatever reason I don’t run… what then am I? What fascinates me isn’t the specific verbs, but rather: What actually am I? This locks me up thinking for long periods. I write. I run. I climb. I jump. Yes, but, what am I?
I look up at the sky, wondering if I’ll catch a glimpse of kindness there, but I don’t. All I see are indifferent summer clouds drifting over the Pacific. And they have nothing to say to me. Clouds are always taciturn. I probably shouldn’t be looking up at them. What I should be looking at is inside of me. Like staring down into a deep well. Can I see kindness there? No, all I see is my own nature.
I enjoyed reading Murakami’s essays. Particularly because I run poorly, I wanted to know what he talks about when he talks about running. In fact, he does talk a great deal about literally running, in addition to the larger perspectives on his life for which everyone loves the book.
But one thing is for sure: I run. But I am not a runner.
Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.
The Stoics believed that, in the end, it’s not about what we do, it’s about who we are when we do it. They believed that anything you do well is noble, no matter how humble or impressive, as long as it’s the right thing. That greatness is up to you—it’s what you bring to everything you do.
Depending on where you are on your own journey, this could be the greatest 25-item list you’ve ever seen, or it could be 24 items of hogwash. How great is that? For me, it’s the one about being kind to oneself which I need most to let sink in farther. Every absolute rule, every simple guideline, and every pithy virtue becomes problematic when taken to the extreme. It’s almost as if *gasp* life is complicated, and I’m a complex person.
I feel like I’m living in the negative. My life isn’t a passing timeline of “this is nice” punctuated with some stuff that qualifies as work, chores, and maintency-things. Instead, I feel like any time I’m in a span of “this is nice”, I’m on borrowed time. It’s is always “this is nice, but…” followed by something I feel I should be doing just as soon as I’m done loafing. It’s as if my personal demon is relaxing, just out of sight at the bar as I loaf here on the veranda, but still dutifully keeping track of exactly how long I’ve been loafing. I continuously feel like things will go better for me (in the way mobsters would say that) if I choose to stop loafing rather than waiting to see how long I can get away with it. That’s not healthy and thus my awareness of the need for self-kindness.
Pay bad people with your goodness; Fight their hatred with your kindness. Even if you do not achieve victory over other people, you will conquer yourself.
How can movement professionals inspire hope, encourage personal growth, and create spaces that foster inclusivity and collaboration?
‘Peanut butter and chocolate’ perfectly describes Dani Almeyda and Tim Anderson’s working relationship, and why they’ve successfully built a business together. They discuss Original Strength, what it takes to work with someone for 10 years, and why they remain passionate about their work. Dani unpacks her work with the Women’s Movement Collaborative, and Tim shares his process and influences. They explain their beginnings as OS, how they’ve grown, and what motivates each of them personally.
If you walk into our studio on the wall, it says: ‘I am awesomely and wonderfully made.’ That’s the message we want people to get when they come in to learn about themselves.
~ Tim Anderson (22:23)
Tim Anderson is an experienced fitness professional, writer, speaker, and former fire fighter. He has over 20 years of experience as a personal trainer, and is the co-creator of the Original Strength System and Original Strength Institute. In addition to fitness, he has authored and co-authored over 5 books. Tim’s methodology is centered on one key principle; we are meant to feel good and be strong throughout our lives.
Our whole goal has always just been to get people to move— to move and to get back to the very basics and the foundations. And the heart of that has always been that we wanted people to feel the hope that movement can bring into life, and to understand that moving heals the body.
~ Dani Almeyda (23:18)
Danielle Almeyda is a fitness professional with over a decade of experience in the industry. She is a the co-creator of the Original Strength System as well as the Original Strength Institute, and the founder of the Women’s Movement Collaborative. Dani’s passion lies in helping people reclaim their movement and their hope.
The conversation explores the transformative power of movement, highlighting its potential to heal the body and inspire hope. It delves into the foundational principles of the Original Strength system, emphasizing simplicity and accessibility in helping individuals reclaim their innate ability to move well. The speakers discuss their mission to create safe, inclusive spaces where movement becomes a tool for empowerment and personal growth, transcending the traditional fitness lens. They describe their unique partnership, which blends complementary strengths to innovate within the movement education field.
A significant part of the discussion focuses on building connections and fostering collaboration. The speakers share insights from their experiences with the Women’s Movement Collaborative, an initiative designed to create a supportive environment for women to explore movement and build confidence. They reflect on the challenges of maintaining authenticity while scaling their efforts and the importance of being relatable to foster meaningful connections with clients and collaborators. Their shared belief in the power of movement to positively impact lives resonates throughout the dialogue.
Takeaways
Creating safe spaces — The importance of designing environments where individuals feel valued and supported in their movement journey.
Movement as a way of life — Movement is presented not just as an exercise regimen but as an integral part of living with vitality.
Collaboration and synergy — The dynamic partnership described showcases the value of blending strengths to create impactful programs.
Empathy in coaching — Coaches must cultivate compassion and relatability to connect deeply with their clients.
Simplifying movement — Returning to foundational, simple movements can be transformative for physical and emotional well-being.
Women’s Movement Collaborative — The impact of creating women-only spaces to foster confidence, vulnerability, and exploration in movement.
Balancing personal growth and business — Insights into navigating personal and professional development within the movement industry.
Resources
Original Strength System — Dani’s and Tim’s movement system designed to help individuals reclaim their innate ability to move well and feel strong.
Tim’s books — Becoming Bulletproof, Original Strength, Press Reset, and more.
How can personal transformation and shifts in perspective influence creativity, community building, and personal growth?
Discover how shifting one’s perspective can lead to profound personal and professional growth.
It was a conscious shift. It was a change in my consciousness to where I can’t go back so I’m going to go forward and I’m going to bring everyone with me.
~ Eric Ayers (6:11)
The conversation explores how transformative personal experiences can lead to profound shifts in perspective and purpose. Eric reflects on his transition from viewing the world through a negative lens to embracing positivity after a pivotal conversation with his wife. This shift not only changed his approach to life but also influenced his podcasting journey, where he combines personal storytelling with interviews to inspire others.
Key themes include the power of perspective, the importance of community, and the role of persistence in achieving meaningful change. Eric also discusses his journey through self-discovery, dietary changes, and the impact of supportive relationships, highlighting the importance of celebrating small successes and nurturing growth. The conversation emphasizes how intentionality and kindness can inspire shifts in others’ mindsets.
Takeaways
Personal transformation — Small changes in perspective can lead to profound life shifts.
The power of mindset — Choosing to see the world positively transforms experiences.
Breaking patterns — Recognizing and changing destructive loops opens new opportunities.
Community impact — Stories and connections foster growth and collaboration.
Persistence — Success often comes through repeated effort and resilience.
Support systems — Relationships and external encouragement catalyze personal growth.
Creativity in podcasting — Combining formats like interviews and personal narratives can create unique content.
Meditation — Reducing mental noise allows for reflection and self-awareness.
Language matters — Positive self-talk reinforces constructive growth.
I love language. Is Machiavelli suggesting less total violence, or more total deception? Or does it suggest that any amount of violence and deception, (including even, more violence than deception,) is fine, so long as you consider deception as your preferred method? Wait. What is the purpose of the word “attempt”? Is it okay to succeed by force, regardless of the possibility of succeeding using deception? Wait, no it’s worse than that even: “Never attempt to win … can be won …” — Is it okay if my aim is simply to sow chaos, without actually attempting to win via either method? Or, what if I attempt to win through some other means, (via kindness or merit or nimble maneuvering or bribery perhaps)?
But I do so love language.
Because despite all those perfectly logical nits that can be picked, it’s a brilliant sentence—even translated into English—packing insight and wisdom which we all grasp instantly and intuitively.
How do personal experiences and creative approaches in stand-up comedy and podcasting intersect to explore humor and connection?
The conversation explores the transformative power of combining humor and reflection in stand-up comedy and podcasting.
I’m interested in the kind of laugh you do when you look at things in a new way. Like, you pierce through something, and it’s a new thought people connect to and identify with.
~ Abby Wambaugh (17:59)
The discussion touches on the creative intersections between stand-up comedy and podcasting, focusing on personal expression and audience connection. Abby shares her journey of creating a podcast during the pandemic to explore humor’s societal impact and their later transition into stand-up. Through podcasting, she experimented with audio formats and advertising parodies, which helped her embrace spontaneity and humor.
Another key topic is the role of feedback in creative processes. Stand-up is highlighted for its immediate audience response, contrasting with podcasting’s private, controlled creation. Insights into how humor fosters social connection and challenges perspectives underscore the transformative potential of laughter, with a focus on maintaining kindness in comedy.
Takeaways
Creating humor that builds connection — Stand-up and podcasting are tools for fostering understanding through laughter.
Feedback as a guide — Immediate audience reactions in stand-up provide invaluable lessons for refining material.
Laughter as social glue — People laugh significantly more in shared settings, emphasizing its role in connection.
Experimentation in formats — Exploring unconventional formats like parody ads can inspire creativity.
Kindness in comedy — Avoiding divisive humor reflects a commitment to constructive engagement.
Exploration of identity — Stand-up and podcasting can be platforms to navigate and express personal identity.
Private versus public creation — Podcasting offers a reflective space, while stand-up demands immediate public interaction.
How does creating a podcast foster meaningful connections and personal growth for both the host and the guests?
A shared journey through vulnerability reveals how podcasting fosters authentic human interaction.
It’s so important to share, and I wouldn’t assert that it’s what you have to do in order to receive— but it almost is, right? You have to give in order to receive.
~ Rien MacDonald (7:14)
The conversation revolves around the transformative power of podcasting as a medium for deepening communication and fostering authentic connections. Rien reflects on how podcasting has sharpened his listening skills and provided a platform to explore and share stories. A poignant example is his mother’s revelation of a deeply personal family secret during an interview, highlighting how vulnerability can unlock moments of unexpected emotional resonance.
Another significant topic is the balance of power in podcasting. While the host controls the technical aspects, genuine collaboration and openness foster trust and enable guests to express themselves fully. Rien also discusses their journey from meticulous editing to embracing the rawness of conversations, emphasizing the importance of shared human experiences.
Takeaways
Creating invitations through questions — Open-ended questions encourage guests to share meaningful insights.
The host’s role in vulnerability — Being authentic and sharing personal stories can inspire guests to do the same.
Magic of storytelling — A microphone often becomes a catalyst for untold stories to surface.
Transformative listening — Actively listening improves not just communication but the ability to connect with others.
Evolution of podcasting skills — Transitioning from over-editing to embracing authenticity refines the podcasting process.
Balancing power dynamics — The host’s vulnerability and kindness can counterbalance their inherent authority in a podcast setting.
Podcasting as collaboration — Episodes become meaningful through shared effort and mutual storytelling.
Personal growth through podcasting — The medium helps hosts and guests reflect on their own lives and experiences.
Self-motivated, self-starting individuals are incredibly motivated to find their weaknesses. It’s not far-fetched to say that some of us actually seek to make ourselves perfect — rational, calculating beings making the right type of decisions at just the right times. But we’ve learned from Star Trek; we don’t look to eliminate emotion either and turn ourselves into Mr. Spock. We want just the right amount of emotion in our lives.
Here’s the two-pronged approach which has been working for me:
First, I remind myself to resist my innate urge to make things worse. Don’t add energy to emotions themselves, nor to things which cause emotions. Emotions are real. We are emotional beings. Emotions get their due. And no more. If things are going badly: relax, they won’t last. If things are going well: relax, they won’t last.
Second, I take note of—literally in my journal—things which cause me to be emotional. It turns out that sometimes I can simply eliminate chronic causes. My goal isn’t to remove all the causes; That’d be a stoopid plan. But sometimes a pain in my foot is simply caused by a stone in my shoe, and is easily removed.
Those could be summarized as, “reminding myself, and taking note.” Those two things are always possible, and always easy. The hard part is remembering to do them. But if I simply—as in: gently, and with self-kindness—do those two things when I do remember, they slowly become habitual. I can’t say I even understand what, “…just right,” would be. But I know for sure what, “just right,” is not.
What lessons and insights can be drawn from mountaineering, personal growth, and facing challenges?
Climbing Mt Everest and the 7 Summits is a huge accomplishment, for John Beede, it’s only the beginning of the story. He discusses his book The Warrior Challenge: 8 Quests for Boys to Grow Up with Kindness, Courage and Grit, and his reasons for writing it. John shares his experiences from mountaineering and climbing Everest, and why climbing is important to him. He reflects on his journey overcoming PTSD, what he’s learned from climbing, and advice for others starting out.
Well, how do you get young men, especially, interested in learning grit, in learning self-awareness, in learning stepping up as a human being or choosing their values? Those are pretty intense subjects even for adults.
~ John Beede (7:36)
John Beede is an adventurer, author, speaker, and one of few people to climb the tallest peak on every continent, including Mt Everest. He has traveled to 67 countries, survived avalanches and PTSD, and more recently has “settled down” to enjoy competitive kite surfing. John is also the author of 3 books, sharing what he’s learned through his adventuring and mountaineering. His newest book is called, The Warrior Challenge: 8 Quests for Boys to Grow Up with Kindness, Courage, and Grit.
The discussion centers on the transformative experiences of mountaineering, particularly climbing Mount Everest and other peaks, and how these adventures mirror challenges in personal growth. Topics include the psychological and emotional impacts of extreme conditions, such as post-traumatic stress, and the healing process that leads to growth. John emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries, cultivating self-awareness, and fostering grit, especially among young people.
The conversation also explores practical tools, such as the 5-2-7 breathing technique, and its role in managing stress and achieving focus. Insights into vulnerability, teamwork, and the value of being present highlight how personal experiences can inspire others. John relates these lessons to writing and speaking, creating accessible narratives to connect with a broader audience.
Takeaways
The significance of boundaries — Setting boundaries is essential for personal and relational health, enabling clarity and mutual respect.
The power of storytelling — Sharing personal experiences can inspire others and create meaningful connections.
Lessons from mountaineering — Facing physical and emotional extremes provides deep insights into resilience and teamwork.
Practical stress management — Techniques like 5-2-7 breathing offer immediate tools for calming and focus.
The value of vulnerability — Embracing and sharing vulnerability leads to personal growth and stronger relationships.
Encouraging young people — Teaching values like grit and courage can help young individuals navigate life’s challenges.
The universality of growth — Everyone, regardless of their journey, has opportunities for learning and self-improvement.
It seems almost paranormal, but I think it’s just more of nature’s evolutionary fine-tuning. Being such social mammals, it would make sense for us to have an uncanny sensitivity for detecting, another person’s sentiments toward us, even when they’re not advertising them.
In recent years I’ve elevated my perception of the subtleties of interpersonal communication—everything beyond the spoken word—from one of those, “I don’t know how I do that,” skills to be something I explicitly practice and notice in others. This is one of the things which makes great actors and actresses: Their ability to produce all the subtleties makes them feel very real to the majority of people who do not detect subtleties consciously. (They of course feel very real to me too. I’m saying I now better understand why and what cues are causing me to feel that way.) This is a super-power. Once you are reasonably competent at detecting what is affecting you, you can then use that information intentionally.
There’s been an enormous amount of discussion recently about facial expression, masks, posture, and intention. In effect, a huge number of people are getting a crash master-course in using and detecting all this subtlety.
A great number of bits are dedicated to discussing motivation. In particular, it’s well-covered that my motivation should spring from within. I should do whatever-it-is because I value the work or the self-transformation. Far too many people are externally motivated and so those bits are well-deployed.
But validation? I don’t hear about that so much.
Engineering, (think bridges and airplanes,) we all agree should be validated. Implicitly we know that means externally validated. We know that engineering done in a filter-bubble is not truly validated, and that ends badly.
But eveyone seems to toss the baby with the bath water: “I’m not doing engineering or hard science, therefore, as a principle, I don’t need external validation.“
But, that’s right only as a corrective term in our lives. “Holy shit our society is too externally motivated, so let’s stop with the external motivation.” Yes, please.
But once you figure out how to do your work from a place of kindness and internal motivation, you next need to put it out there. Put a price tag on it… Ask for feedback… Does the book sell… Do the people who follow your advice go on to do nicer or better things… In short, are you efficacious?
Yes yes yes art for arts’ sake is not what I’m talking about. Paint just for yourself and die an undiscovered master—that’s internal motivation for the win. (not sarcasm)
But if, you know, what you’re doing is supposed to be True, (however that’s defined for whatever it is you’re doing,) then you better put yourself out there and get some external validation. Yes, you’re going to need thick skin, and certainly don’t go alone, but go you must.
