As I’m getting ready for a road trip, I’m finishing up as many things as I can. I always say I want to spend less time at my computer. That will definitely be the case for the next five days. Yes, please.
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On this day
May 29th
Nothingness
I truly don’t mind the cold; I enjoy snow and blustery winds and cozy fires and hot cocoa. Arguably, I suffer much more in unusually hot weather than I do in unusually cold weather. But even I have a limit.
The man felt like a speck in the frozen nothingness. Every direction he turned, he could see ice stretching to the edge of the Earth: white ice and blue ice, glacial-ice tongues and ice wedges. There were no living creatures in sight. Not a bear or even a bird. Nothing but him.
~ David Grann from, The White Darkness
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That is far, far beyond my limit.
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New kind of society
[…] what we need is a few hints on the art of creating an entirely new kind of society, durable but adventurous, strong but humane, highly organized but liberty-loving, elastic and adaptable. In this matter Greece and Rome can teach us only negatively—by demonstrating, in their divergent ways, what not to do.
~ Aldous Huxley
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Setting and scene
Lately I’ve been struggling with setting. As many people have noted, excessive fiddling with getting things ready, or “just so”, before feeling one can begin to do something is simply a form of procrastination. It’s a form of hiding from doing the work. Steven Pressfield describes this as the “resistance” which shows up just when you are finally facing the real work that you are called to do.
I tell this story not because I think a method approach, in which you inhabit your characters and their behaviors, is the best way to write fiction. (If this were true, a lot more authors would take a swing at romance novels.) But instead because it’s an extreme example of a more general point that I’ve been emphasizing recently: when it comes to cognitive work, setting makes a difference.
~ Cal Newport from, On Vampires and Method Writing
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Setting is real, and it is important. But there’s a second part to finding (or creating) the optimal environment: Scene. Where are the others who are also doing the same work? It could be the other painters or authors like you, and you’re all living in a neighborhood and regularly gathering and conversing at the local cafes. (The archetypical writers scene of the 1900s was in Paris.) If I’ve imagineered a certain niche of work that I want to do, how do I find (or create) the scene?
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Keeping you small
The trick is: You bite off more than you can chew… and then you still chew it. Your mind always believes it can do less than it actually can. It will tell you it’s too much, to stop, to take a break, to cancel this or that. But your mind will lie to you to keep you small.
~ Will Smith
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Discourse
You don’t know if your idea is any good the moment it’s created. Neither does anyone else. The most you can hope for is a strong gut feeling that it is. And trusting your feelings is not as easy as the optimists say it is. There’s a reason why feelings scare us—because what they tell us and what the rest of the world tells us are often two different things.
~ Hugh MacLeod
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This quote, I think, also alludes to the problem of people “not getting” new ideas. It turns out that the same problem exists for old ideas to which people have grown unaccoustomed through lack of use.
Online discussion in forums is not a new idea. It’s a time-tested idea; They can be a space to focus interaction. There are ground rules. There’s a border defining what’s inside and what’s outside. Those inside have skin in the game. There is accountability.
The challenge is for each of us to resume engaging in reasoned discourse with others. That can be done in many places, not just in online forums. But in general, we’ve lost it in, (something like,) the last ten years when the current incarnation of the social networks rose and ate our attention.
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The only way out is through
If it’s easy, you’re not growing.
It’s like lifting weights: if you can do it without trying, you’re not going to get any stronger.
The whole point—of life, of working out, of work—is to push yourself, and to grow as a result of pushing against and through that resistance.
~ Ryan Holiday from, If You’re Not Seeking Out Challenges, How Are You Going to Get Better?
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Nine years ago I was smack in the middle of my HVAC-installer apprenticeship. I lovingly refer to the roughly two-week period as, “that time I got really into attic-yoga.” The contractor installing our central HVAC had a young fellow working with him, and that guy hurt his knee. I spent days learning how to make and insulate hard duct work, HVAC line sets (the wiring and refrigerant piping), electrical, removed the ancient mouse-pee infused blown-in insulation and eventually put in new fiberglass insulation through the attic. It was hell. Hot. Sweaty. Ichy. Low roof. Things to climb in, over, around, through and under. Mostly while carefully stepping, squatting, leaning, and crawling on the long thing ceiling joists. And it was not something I was planning on doing. One day I was all like, “Benjamin is installing the HVAC!” [that’s a money reference] and the next day I was studying attic-yoga.
I bring this up because it’s too easy to think “I’m doing the hard work!” when you are simply going to the gym (or for the morning run, whatever.) Sure, you’re working hard, you’re sweating, and building muscle; you are literally doing hard work.
But that’s nothing compared to choosing to do the hard work, on the spot. Do I whinge and call AAA (road-side assistance club) or do I climb under the van to figure out how to get the spare tire out at Midnight after a long day? Do I take the time to split the portion of the firewood that would be a pain 8 months from now, or do I just stack it and hate my today-self in the dead of winter? Do I take the time to carefully explain something even though it’s not my responsibility or do I just “walk past” that person who needs a hand? Right now, on the spot, do you choose the hard path?
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What’s in a title?
Should I write the title first, or last?
Should the title be a clear signpost of what is to come?
…or should the title prepare the reader?
…prime their mental state, jar them out of common trains of thought, give them the first bit of context, …
Should the title be short, or loquacious?
An interrogative or a statement.
Should the tense (present, past, passive, active, …) match, or provide counter-point?
If I practiced by writing 2,509 titles would I be able to write a title for a post on titles?
Could I remove the titles entirely?
Should I remove the titles entirely?
What is my intention for having titles? (Hi Angie!)
Should I have the same intention each time I’m composing a title?
Could the title be revealed last—only after the piece is read?
Email has a subject line; not a title line.
Does a title convey the subject?
…always? …sometimes? …maybe it never should?
Can a subject be a title?
Could a title contain the subject but also serve some as-yet-undiscovered-by-me purpose?
Should a title set the tone?
…create tension? …allude to the subject?
…and be short?
Do people judge what I write by the title?
Do people who read a lot of my posts, versus those who are having their first experience, use the titles differently?
Or maybe the title’s primary purpose is to serve as a mental bookmark for the piece after it’s been read?
Wait. What was I going to write about today?
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Weena Pauly-Tarr: Therapy, motherhood, and impulse
What experiences and practices shape the transition from structured movement disciplines to embodied, intuitive forms of movement and healing?
Weena Pauly-Tarr shares her history of dance, her brief encounter with parkour, and how those experiences have led to where she is now. She unpacks her work with somatic therapy, and the profound changes motherhood has brought to her life and practice. Weena reflects on her current interests in embodiment and impulse, and discusses her search for what is next.
The only thing I’ve ever wanted in my life—clearly and said out loud—was to be a mom. not to be a dancer, or not to move to New York… none of that was the thing. It was to be a mom. […] And so when I became pregnant, it was like the biggest gift I’ve ever been given. It was like getting the one thing you’ve always wanted, your whole life. It’s terrifying. Because what if it gets taken away, all that starts to come up. So I think what happened is, I had to grapple with receiving the thing I’ve always wanted.
~ Weena Pauly-Tarr (30:31)
The conversation covers how personal experiences with dance, Parkour, and somatic therapy intersect in a lifelong exploration of movement and healing. Weena’s dance background, including work with impactful movement styles like Streb’s Pop Action, shaped her understanding of strength, fear, and embodiment. Parkour later emerged as a natural extension of this interest, allowing for further exploration of dynamic movement in unconventional settings.
Motherhood significantly shifted her perspective, introducing new layers of vulnerability and embodiment. This experience influenced her shift from performance-based movement to therapeutic and somatic practices. She discusses her evolving approach to working with clients, focusing on impulse, somatic healing, and authentic movement. Her exploration of trauma through somatic experiencing highlighted the connections between past injuries and subconscious movement patterns.
Takeaways
Impact and strength — Early dance experiences emphasized the importance of using strength and physicality in movement.
Embodiment through trauma — Somatic experiences can reveal how unresolved trauma manifests in physical patterns.
Motherhood’s transformation — Motherhood shifted priorities and expanded the practice of vulnerability and authenticity.
Parkour as extension — Parkour became a natural extension of visceral, impact-based dance forms.
Healing through movement — Movement serves as a method for personal and emotional healing.
Impulse as guidance — Allowing movement to arise from impulse promotes deeper embodiment and awareness.
Reframing fear — Both Parkour and somatic practices teach reframing fear and failure as growth.
Resources
Weena Pauly-Tarr @weenapaulytarr
Elizabeth Streb’s TED Talk — Discusses Pop Action and the concepts of impact-based movement.
Phoenix Rising Yoga Therapy — A form of somatic healing that bridges bodywork and talk therapy.
(Written with help from Chat-GPT.)
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Time management
The caveat is that this quadrant can be mistaken as something that shouldn’t be part of life, but that is not true. It is really important to have a balanced life between work and your personal life. You need downtime to not get burnt out and that is where quadrant four comes into the picture. The challenge is you allocate most of your time to quadrant two, with just enough of time spent in quadrant four to get by.
~ Thanh Pham, from How To Prioritize Todo Lists With A Sheet of Paper
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I disagree.
Everything in the UN-important half (the lower half in the diagrams) of the quadrant is the Bad Lands to be avoided. There’s no such thing as “work life balance.” I spent decades trying to fiddle with that balance. There is only life. I strive to do only important things. I strive to only do NON-urgent things by paying attention to what I should be doing. I strive for a wide variety of activities which are all necessary, important and not urgent. One might even say: “To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.”
I have control over only two things: My thoughts and my actions.
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Seriously, this again?
(Part 32 of 36 in series, 10,000 Reps Project)
Two weeks ago I started back into putting some numbers on the board. But this just-past-week I hurt my back. Tuesday I did 80 bar precisions (an easy number), but my back was feeling tired. Then Wednesday, I was really pushing it. No, actually, all I did was stand up from my desk chair. *bam* So the brunt of last week was rest, and recovery. Again. :/
On Saturday, I was feeling much better so I eased back into some normal activity. Ran for 20 minutes (with someone who is a faster runner) then did 45 minutes of QM on a tennis court — managed to go 45 minutes without standing up and with only hands and/or feet on the ground. Then I had firewood delivered about 9:30, and spent four hours of hard labor stacking it all. (I clearly don’t understand what “ease” means.)
Today, my back still feels good; it’s still recovering but on the mend.
We’re going to our regular parkour class today from 3-5. Should be beautiful weather – for heat stroke. After that, we’re heading over to the pool for some lounge time in the shade.
Monday I’ll start back into putting some numbers back up. But THIS time, I’m staying on the resistance bands longer to make sure my back is ok.
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Human morality
A man does what he must – in spite of personal consequences, in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures – and that is the basis of all human morality.
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