What we miss about our own beloved Good Old Days isn’t so much the material things they remind us of—wholesome 1980s sitcoms, or musty thrift-store sweaters—it’s the particular feelings those days gave us, feelings which are now impossible to experience.
Cain rightly goes on to point out, that while we can’t feel those exact feelings again, there’s no reason we can’t—right this very instant—enjoy These Good Days. Ten years from now—presuming, of course—I can look back and think with a chuckle: Remember when I spent a couple years going really deep experimenting with knowledge systems. That was a fun exploration.
To live without self-respect is to lie awake some night, beyond the reach of warm milk, phenobarbital, and the sleeping hand on the coverlet, counting up the sins of commission and omission, the trusts betrayed, the promises subtly broken, the gifts irrevocably wasted through sloth or cowardice or carelessness. However long we postpone it, we eventually lie down alone in that notoriously uncomfortable bed, the one we make ourselves. Whether or not we sleep in it depends, of course, on whether or not we respect ourselves.
Sanderson argues you should instead experiment to figure out what combination of motivation, and circumstances, and accountability work best for your particular personality. He responds well to tracking a daily word count in a spreadsheet. Others, he notes, thrive under the social pressures of a writing group, while others lean on deadlines to induce work. The key is recognizing that the urge to avoid hard things is human, and should be expected. It’s part of the process.
I’m filing this under “things I wish I had learned 30 years ago”. Some things I really track, and some things I just do whenever I feel like. One way or another though, it’s important that I be honest with myself. “Do I really want to do this?” …or do I just like the idea of being able to say “I did that”?
How does the process of reflection and self-improvement shape personal growth and teaching methodologies?
Alan Tran is a parkour coach and collaborator from Raleigh, North Carolina. He’s the founder of Enso Movement and is a director for both the Art of Retreat and the United States Parkour Association. Alan continues to serve the parkour and movement community through active service and outreach.
I carved out the space to de-evolve and reinvent myself. In many ways, it wasn’t intentional by any means, at the start of my personal practices. But in many ways, it was a way for me to redefine who I was, who I wanted to be, and where my work would lead to.
~ Alan Tran (29:36)
The discussion weaves through themes of reflection, journaling, and the impact of vulnerability on personal growth and teaching. Through daily journaling practices, the importance of documenting emotions, achievements, and challenges emerges as a way to identify growth and patterns over time. Cultural connections, like the preservation of family history through photography, also highlight how past experiences inform one’s values and identity.
The conversation also explores innovative teaching techniques inspired by training a dog using communication buttons. This segues into reflections on coaching methodologies, the value of structured progressions, and how spontaneity plays a role in both teaching and personal development. By examining challenges like preparing for workshops under time constraints and balancing intuition with structure, the dialogue emphasizes growth through experimentation and self-awareness.
Takeaways
Reflection as a practice — Journaling and revisiting past thoughts help in recognizing personal growth and emotional patterns.
Cultural connections — Family stories and historical documentation preserve identity and values across generations.
Coaching methodologies — Structured progressions and spontaneity are key elements in effective teaching.
Experimentation and intuition — Creativity and growth often stem from embracing failure and learning under pressure.
The role of vulnerability — Being authentic and open fosters meaningful interactions and personal development.
To me, quality means doing the best you can with what you have to work with. Your environment. Your equipment. Your voice. Your experience. Your level of comfort. All of those things are part of your overall “working with” toolset.
This is something I often struggle with. Terra is writing about podcasting specifically—something I spend a lot of time doing—but I have this problem more generally. It would serve me well to be thinking: Is this the best I can do now, with the tools, knowledge, situation, and skills I have now? If so, terrific! That’s great enough.
This is one of the main obstacles to forming habits. Our hopeful idea of how it will go, and then our disappointment and frustration with ourselves when it doesn’t go that way.
Nerd alert: I’ve always appreciated that Babauta takes the time to craft the URL paths (often called the “slug”) by hand. They’re not simply auto-generated from the titles of the posts. I love that this particular one, about perfectionism, has a single-word slug that contains the word “perfect”.
While writing this post I spun off to discover Grammar Monster. Yikes! Driven by my perfectionism, that’s the sort of thing that I could spend hours in. I backed away from it very slowly.
There is no man, however wise, who has not at some period of his youth said things, or even lived in a way which was so unpleasant to him in later life that he would gladly, if he could, expunge it from his memory. But he shouldn’t regret this entirely, because he cannot be certain that he has indeed become a wise man—so far as any of us can be wise—unless he has passed through all the fatuous or unwholesome incarnations by which that ultimate stage must be reached.
Granted, cultivating a slipbox is a lot of work. This morning, as I regularly do, I was rereading journal entries. A year ago I had made note of a book, Trust Yourself, and how it had spurred some specific thinking. Finding mention of the book in my journal caused me to reflect on what I had written: Was it still accurate? Journaling for the win.
I had also made a little note, “(2tu1)” of the book’s slip in the slipbox. It took only a moment to flip there… and to discover I had written out 9 slips under the book with some take-aways and key learnings from the book. A crash refresher on the book, completely unbidden; A gift from my self-from years past.
The first element to consider when creating a more realistic “ideal day” is that unlike Franklin, we have many more places to be and many more opportunities to lose focus. We have to account for this, not fight against it.
This simplicity was disorienting in a way. Many times a day I would finish whatever activity I was doing, and realize there was nothing to do but consciously choose another activity and then do that. This is how I made my first bombshell discovery: I take out my phone every time I finish doing basically anything, knowing there will be new emails or mentions or some other dopaminergic prize to collect. I have been inserting an open-ended period of pointless dithering after every intentional task.
It is still uncommon for me to be without my phone. I have to admit that sometimes I carry it simply because I have a flat pince-nez stuck to the back of my phone. Recently it’s dawned on me that I have another, identical pair in a tiny flat case not stuck to my phone and I sometimes just carry those and not my phone. Regardless, you’ll never see me whip out my phone—unless we have a question, what’s the weather, where’s the nearest…, and so on. It’s a tool I sometimes use, like shoes.
A few weeks ago I finally got around to starting a dedicated newsletter for my thoughts on conversation over on called Open + Curious. This new, weekly newsletter is free to subscribers through Substack—you can read it on the web or via email.
Over on Substack I’m publishing more polished work. I’m sharing what I’ve learned and hopefully engaging in discussion.
The blog here at constantine.name remains the same; same posts, same quotes, same same. Here on the blog things are messy as I’m working with garage door up. There’s a lot of discovery and reflection happening here. If you’ve not been to the actual blog web site in a while, you may want to swing by my Projects Page to see what I’m up to.
What’s often left out of those criticisms of dynamism is what a dynamic society actually means that’s truly positive, and that is when you have a society where people are thinking up new things and starting them, you get the benefits of those ideas all the way downstream: better jobs, more better jobs, jobs that people are happier with, and the like.
This long-read goes deep into society, economics, and even politics. It’s a little different than things I generally post. The particular point quoted above feels like a non-zero-sum-game feature of trade among individuals. In a good trade, everyone separately agrees that they are better off after the trade. There’s net increase in “better off”—however we manage to measure that, be it in dollars, or smiles. (Aside: Coercion of any sort disqualifies a trade from being “good” in my estimation.)
Wise consumption is much more complicated than wise production. What five people will produce, one person can very easily consume, and the question for each individual and for every nation is not how are we to produce, but how our products are to be consumed.
Here’s something I’ve noticed about myself: If I read something great, I’ll sometimes write a short comment like “This was amazing, you’re the best!” Then I’ll stare at it for 10 seconds and decide that posting it would be lame and humiliating, so I delete it go about my day. But on the rare occasions that I read something that triggers me, I get a strong feeling that I have important insights. Assuming that I’m not uniquely broken in this way, it explains a lot.
I too have this tendency. In recent years I’ve been actively working on my own version of “See something. Say something.” as part of my changes to achieve results. My version is that nice things must be said out loud. No more sitting on the positive thoughts; Yes, I need to squish my incessant critical commentary. Dial that down, please. But I also need to practice letting out the good stuff too. Nice shirt. Smooth movement. This food is delicious. It’s so insanely comfortable here. Thank you for making this come together. If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.
How does play and movement intersect with personal growth, mental health, and the practice of Parkour?
Exploring how Parkour connects to mental health and play reveals deep personal insights.
It’s all about play. And I think that making— I love strengthening and I love building— you know, physical capacity. But in the end, that’s just a couple of stepping stones towards building people’s ability to play.
~ Kel Glaister (6:46)
The discussion opens with reflections on the influence of animals, like Kel’s dog, on humility and how they bring perspective to human movement practice. The conversation then expands to explore the cultural and environmental factors shaping Parkour, emphasizing the unique styles and strengths fostered by different regions. There’s an emphasis on how community and environmental context influence the practice.
Kel shares personal insights about the role of play in movement and the transition from self-critical motivations to a more compassionate approach. Craig and Kel discuss the impact of mental health struggles and how this shaped their training philosophy, shifting focus toward longevity and joy in movement. The role of organizations like Parkour Earth is also examined, highlighting the importance of global representation and grassroots involvement in shaping the future of the discipline.
Takeaways
Nonhuman animals in movement — They provide perspective and humility to human practice.
Cultural and environmental influence — Regional differences shape distinct movement styles in Parkour.
Play as a foundation — Movement should be guided by joy and curiosity, not just performance.
Mental health and movement — Training can transition from self-loathing to self-compassion.
Role of global organizations — Community engagement is crucial for creating representative bodies.
Training longevity — A sustainable approach balances physical and emotional well-being.
The role of ambassadors — Advocacy and representation strengthen global networks in Parkour.
Resources
Parkour Earth — An international body aiming to represent and advocate for the Parkour community globally.
Pay bad people with your goodness; Fight their hatred with your kindness. Even if you do not achieve victory over other people, you will conquer yourself.
Stoicism, in theory, is a philosophy. As a practice, it is a set of rules to live by. The Stoics believed that life was complicated—more importantly, that it was exhausting. So to create rules was to help ensure that we stay on the right path, that we don’t let the complexity and the nuance of each individual scenario allow us to compromise on the big, high standards we know we hold.
This is an enormous post. Normally something of this size would be twelve, separate posts. It’s nice to be able to leisurely read through this. I’ve gotten enormous return on my investment of time from these rules. I often remind myself, however, that these are aspirational. These are the ideals for which I’m striving. They are not the reef upon which I’m planning on smashing the ship through strict adherence.
