My future self

People who succeed look to give their future selves an edge. They seek to put themselves in a more advantaged position down the road. They make small sacrifices today to alleviate stress and enjoy more fulfillment tomorrow.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2016/08/patterns-of-success/

There’s an old adage about how we consistently over-estimate what can be accomplished in a day, while under-estimating what can be accomplished in a lifetime.

At some point I started loosely planning each day; There are times when I completely pause this daily activity, but in general, early in the morning I create a plan for the day. I disagree with the often repeated recommendation to plan the night before. In the evening, as I’m winding down, planning my day would place me in front of my computer which is something I avoid at all costs.

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On not letting go

I experimented by letting go of goals for a while and just going with the flow, but that produced even worse results. I know some people are fans of that style, but it hasn’t worked well for me. I make much better progress — and I’m generally happier and more fulfilled — when I wield greater conscious control over the direction of my life.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2013/07/do-your-goals-conflict-with-your-personality/

“Letting go” of my structures and goals is good for short-term health. I do this when I’m traveling, or when something unusual happens, (such as having a house guest for a weekend.) Letting go enables me to see if my default habits have changed, as I’m often working on some goal or project that involves habit change. Letting go creates space for serendipity.

But letting go does not get things done. My mind is meant to have ideas, not to hold them. Systems (a grocery list, a todo list, plans for projects, and so on) are how my mind creates the changes I want to see in the world.

Letting go certainly recharges me. It’s the restorative yin to my personality’s default yan.

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Ownership

Ownership is somewhat of a gray area, both with physical and virtual real estate. I use the term loosely here. Ownership depends on how much control you have over the property, so we have a spectrum of possibilities. For instance, if you want to discover who really owns your home, stop paying your property taxes for a while and see what happens.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2012/06/virtual-real-estate/

This pull-quote has little to do with the linked article. It simply made me laugh out loud—for real, in the literal sense. If you’ve not owned a house, you cannot aprehend property taxes. I digress.

Just before this article by Steve, I had read a short piece about adulthood and children. A piece about parents who give children too much choice. It contained a thought or three about:

Why would I want to grow up and have to accept all the responsibility, when I already have all the freedom and luxury?

That is one of the Big Questions. The day on which I understood the answer was the 3rd most important day of my life.

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Happiness first

Social conditioning may have convinced you that sacrificing your happiness to maintain a certain bank balance, to send timely payments to corporations to which you’re indebted, or to pay for someone else’s needs and expenses is the proper way to live. Perhaps your parents played a role in this conditioning as well, teaching you the importance of being responsible and holding down stable employment.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2012/08/happiness-first-then-everything-else/

There’s a lot of value to the idea of, “and now that you are moving, you can steer.” Lots of metaphors here: A ship’s rudder doesn’t work unless the ship is moving; A car cannot turn around unless it is moving; etc. But there’s a vastly bigger picture that, “you can steer,” will never reveal.

It doesn’t matter how fast I’m “moving” or how well I “steer” if I’m on the wrong eff’in continent.

Steve often writes phoofy new-age mumbo jumbo stuff that I can’t even read. Why do I keep reading [you might ask]? Filter bubble. Perspective. Articles like this one which challenge the reader to wipe off the entire board and consider redrawing the plate tectonics.

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What are the odds?

What does such a statistic have to do with your personal chance of success? Nothing at all.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/12/what-are-the-odds-of-becoming-a-black-belt/

This has nothing to do with martial arts.

If you—you reading this right now—are NOT making mistakes, you are not learning.

Put another way: If you are always certain—or if you can’t take action until you are certain—then you are not doing the work you need to be doing.

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Triage

The practice of triage is a challenge of consciousness. It’s easy to lose sight of the big picture when you’re staring at a project screaming for your attention. But you still need to muster the awareness to ask, “Is this the most important thing that must be done by me right now?” Whenever you fail to ask this question, you can bet there’s a more important project being stalked by the Grim Reaper.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/12/triage/

There are many variations of this. My favorite is currently a large note above my desk which reads…

2018: “HELL YES!” or “no”

Regardless, Covey’s quadrants are an excellent way to triage things.

I’m adamant however, that one’s goal should be to do nothing in Covey’s quadrants 3 and 4—things which are “not important”, wether they are urgent or non-urgent. See also, Time management.

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News addiction

After a couple weeks without news, I got past the hump and wasn’t craving it so much anymore. At this point I began reflecting on the habit from a distance, and I made the following observations …

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/09/overcoming-news-addiction/

100%

I substituted a syndication reader‡ and never looked back. I now read only the sources I want, when I want. Nothing beats my morning caffeine accompanied by a scroll through my feed reader. NOTHING I read is a “standard” news source. :)

‡ I suggest collecting your feeds into http://www.feedbin.com and then using Reeder (IOS, Mac).

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The global level of consciousness

The only practical and lasting solution to global violence is that we must raise the global level of consciousness. Only when that occurs will violence cease to be part of the human experience. Until that happens violence will always be with us.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/07/ask-steve-how-to-resolve-global-conflicts/

This is a beautiful observation. Beautiful in the sense that it let’s me stop fretting over violence and wars, and frees me to think about things like: Can I help [this person / these people]?

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Suffering is not what you think it is

Suffering is nothing more than a lack of consciousness. The more conscious you become, the less you suffer. The act of raising your consciousness is really a process of letting go of every thought that causes you to suffer. This process can take considerable time, but it does work. Every step you take in this direction will yield an improvement.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/07/ask-steve-staying-conscious-while-under-attack/

Self-improvement is an exercise in lifting oneself up by the bootstraps; Quite impossible and quite necessary.

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The power of now

This shift in thinking produced a significant shift in my priorities. I began focusing more of my energy on improving the quality of my present reality instead of projecting all those improvements into the realm of someday. I started asking questions like, “How can I experience more joy in this very moment?”

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/05/the-power-of-now/

Steve’s writing is probably an acquired taste — some of it I’m still not swallowing. But this one was well worth the read; Probably well-worth a re-read too. ;)

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Social conditioning

If we support a foreign war or oppose it, it’s because of what effect it’s having on us, either individually or collectively. Our soldiers are dying. Our President is making us look bad. Our corporations are manipulating us. Our national debt is out of control. My taxes might go up. My budget might be stretched. My family member might be killed. We aren’t encouraged to consider such situations from the viewpoint of planet earth as a whole, or how our actions today might affect future generations. We perceive each other as separate and distinct individuals as opposed to cells in the same body.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/03/what-lies-beyond-the-haze-of-social-conditioning/

This isn’t about “us” versus “them. It’s about “I”. How do I see my world? How do I see myself? Have I been conditioned? (duh. Of course I have.) Now that I’ve discovered I have a brain, do I like how I’ve been conditioned?

…oh sorry, got to talking to myself there.

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Sort out what is important

Every day I have a choice between working on pointless little tasks or big meaningful projects. On days that I choose the former, I end each day feeling I’ve accomplished very little, even though I’ve put in a lot of hours at my desk. I’ve kept up, but all I did was spin my wheels for another day. But when I chose to do the important stuff first, I feel great, knowing that I’m on my way to producing major results.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/03/conscious-procrastination/

More than 25 years ago, Steven Covey included a simple graph in a book. This task right here– is it important, and is it urgent?

Anything that’s not important, well, good– You just stopped doing that. Gaming, television, most of what you do on the internet, etc. If you’re still doing UN-important stuff… I don’t know what to say.

Now the important stuff is where the hard thinking begins. How important? Does it pay off now, or later? Does is pay off for me, my family (but not me), my family (including me), my tribe, the world . . . well, sorting out all the important stuff is IMPORTANT but not URGENT and so it gets skipped and pushed off. I’m happy to be the bearer of great news: You now know the most important thing to do: Sort out what is important to you.

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Arrogance

If you want to accelerate your rate of personal growth, work on becoming as honest as possible, both with yourself and others. The more honest you become, the more accurate will be your model of reality. And this will dramatically improve the success rate of your decisions and actions. Overconfidence and underconfidence are equally problematic, so strive for accuracy instead.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/02/the-three-bears-arrogance-timidity-honesty/

Certainly there is a time and place for emotions. (Appropriate emotions of course.) But my experience is that any time my emotions, or my beliefs get a hold of the steering wheel things veer badly. I do much better when I use my brain to think things through, sort wheat from the chaff, and make plans. I’m not sure where I’m going, but I sure know where I came from.

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What to do with your life?

If you’ve read this much without turning away, then your awareness is already too high for you to be happy living like the sleeping masses. It’s time to wake up. The bright light will hurt your eyes at first, even make your eyes water, but you’ll get used to it. And then you’ll receive your own high-powered awareness flashlight. And I have to tell you that it’s oodles of fun shining that thing in people’s eyes when they least suspect it…

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/02/deciding-what-to-do-with-your-life/

If you are seeking entertainment instead of education… wake up!
If you frequently say, “I have to…” … wake up!
If you can no longer read… wake up!
If you can no longer write… wake up!
If you can no longer move… wake up!

( …remember that comment I made a few days ago about the line? )

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Waking up

Sometimes when my wife and I have conversations in public, it looks like the scene from the movie Dogma where Loki and Bartleby walk through the airport talking about their previous exploits as angels. We often look around at all the sleeping people in the world, noting that they barely register as conscious beings. They go through their lives working meaningless jobs, enduring unfulfilling relationships, and drugging themselves to avoid facing their unfaceable fears. Their conversations are nothing but trivialities in the grand scheme of things.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2006/01/are-you-a-bear-or-an-eagle/

There is a fine line between condescendent and enlightened. The first requisite for enlightenment is awareness of the line, and another is having the courage to get precariously close to it.

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Decisions

If you want to achieve a goal you’ve set, the most crucial part is to DECIDE to manifest it. It doesn’t matter if you feel it’s outside your control to do so. It doesn’t matter if you can’t yet see how you’ll get from A to B. Most of those resources will come online AFTER you’ve made the decision, not before.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/10/cause-effect-vs-intention-manifestation/

Reaching my goals does NOT happen simply by my wishing for it. However, making a decision and visualizing the goal DOES get me on my way there. The more I believe, the more I push the boundaries, the more I explore while reaching for the vision, and the harder I work… the luckier I get.

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Persistence

If you’re growing at all as a human being, then you’re going to be a different person each year than you were the previous year. And if you consciously pursue personal development, then the changes will often be dramatic and rapid. You can’t guarantee that the goals you set today will still be ones you’ll want to achieve a year from now.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/06/self-discipline-persistence/

I am noticing the confirmation bias effect often. In the last year (or so) I’ve been paying more attention to goals– what is a good goal? how to set a goal? how to plan to reach a goal? The more I work on the skill(s) related to goals, the more I’m find I’m tripping over more and more writing such as the above. I’m willing to bet the writing isn’t happening more frequently (notice the year in the URL above).

But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

~ Robert Frost, from Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening

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You Need People

When you’re stuck in a black hole where it’s impossible for you to reach escape velocity, your only hope for escape is to find an even stronger gravitational field to pull you out. People act a lot like gravitational fields, and when you put enough of them together, all tugging at you in a consistent direction, you’re going to move.

~ Steve Pavlina from, https://stevepavlina.com/blog/2005/08/you-need-people/

This is a vastly better version of the old adage, “you are the average of your five closest friends.” I very intentionally use the people I find and train with in the Art du Dèplacement universe in this way. (Semantic detour: I may have you plotted in the ADD space even if you would say you are in some other.) If I’ve trained with you, you now know why I am sincerely appreciative of _your_ contribution to my journey.

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