Mental badassery: Becoming aware of the stories we tell ourselves

Now, telling ourselves stories is natural — we all do it, all the time. There’s nothing wrong with it. But if we’re not aware of the stories we tell ourselves, we can’t understand how they shape our happiness, relationships, moods, and more.

~ Leo Babauta from, Mental Badassery: Becoming Aware of the Stories We Tell Ourselves – Zen Habits Website

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Alternative paths

This entry is part 8 of 37 in the series Study inspired by Pakour & Art du Déplacement by V. Thibault

Post class thoughts? Not many. Class is usually pretty visceral, (as one would expect,) and there’s not much time for an internal dialog of philosophical thinking. There were of course various opportunities to come up with relatively creative solutions to physical movements and challenges. But nothing particularly interesting in the context of this discussion. I think the primary reason this “alternate paths” section didn’t stand out in class was that everyone there already thinks this way. Almost everyone in class is already applying this section’s ideas — at least applying it in the physical context.

And so, I hadn’t bothered to put up a “nothing to report” report. Until I happened to read:

As you begin to learn something, notice when you feel frustrated with sucking. It might be really difficult, confusing, full of failure. You’re out of your comfort zone, and you want to go back into it.

Now turn to this feeling of frustration, or whatever difficult feeling you’re having: confusion, impatience, boredom, feeling bad about yourself, wanting to quit.

Turn to the feeling, and instead of trying to stop it or avoid it … try sitting with it (or running with it). Just be there with it. Let it be in you, give it space.

~ Leo Babauta, from The Gentle Art of Trying Something & Sucking at It – Zen Habits Website

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I’m pulling disparate threads together here of course. But this is the feeling! I look at something really sketchy, challenging or downright scary, and my mind flees to the easy path. Took a lot of work to get my body to NOT flee to the easy path, which eventually gave my mind a bit of time to look at the “I don’t think so…” path and give it some consideration. In hindsight, I think it’s what Babauta describes so succinctly.

So, uh, yeah. What Thibault said. And also what Babauta said. :*)

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Work with curiosity

This entry is part 6 of 37 in the series Study inspired by Pakour & Art du Déplacement by V. Thibault

Finally, going forward, let’s practice tossing out our expectations of how we’re going to do today (and in life in general), and instead adopt an attitude of curiosity. We don’t know how we’re going to do at work, or in our relationships, or with our personal habits. We can’t know. So let’s find out: what will today be like? How will it go?

~ Leo Babauta from, A Guide to Dealing with Frustration & Disappointment in Yourself – Zen Habits Website

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Another something that jumped out at me as part of my regular, ongoing reading. Leo talks a lot about “mindfulness” and related practices. If you’re digging Vincent’s section 1, I think you’ll like this too.

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Overcoming the distraction habit

One of the insidious things about the distraction habit is that we often don’t even realize it’s happening. It sneaks up on us, like old age, and before we know it we’re addicted and powerless.

But actually we’re not powerless. The power we have is our awareness, and you can develop it right now. Pay attention to what sites you visit, how often you’re looking at your phone, how long you’re spending in front of a screen all day.

~ Leo Babauta from, An Addict’s Guide to Overcoming the Distraction Habit – Zen Habits Website

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Discipline

There’s no right answer. The present self usually wins, because he controls the action and so his interests are more important. But the future self actually has a stronger case: he’s actually a bunch of future selves (you in 10 minutes from now, an hour from now, a day from now, three days from now, a year later, and so on). So shouldn’t a thousand future selves outweigh the current self’s interest?

~ Leo Babauta from, Savor Discipline: Merge the Interests of Your Future & Present Selves – Zen Habits Website

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Not claiming I have this one all figured out. Just claiming you should read everything Leo writes…

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Start saying ‘No’

To this student, and to everyone else who feels this way, I’d say this: your plate is too full. You have too much going on.

The only answer, unless you want your health to decline (and that’s not good for anyone), is to start saying No.

~ Leo Babuta from, When Your Plate is Too Full

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I really hope everyone else finds this totally obvious.

…because I didn’t, and I wasted a lot of my life “should’ing” on myself. I should do this. I should do that. I should be working. I should take time off. blah blah blah. I started saying “No” to little things first… really silly dumb stuff that I did all the time. Like check my email FIRST thing after opening my eyes. Saved myself, maybe, 5 seconds every day right there. Maybe instead now I glance out the window first. Then I moved on to bigger and bigger things; Do I really want to try to start this professional meetup group? Do I really want to continue studying tai chi? Do I want to keep writing in my journal? (Yes, but I can change my expectations for what gets into the journal from, “a good long journal entry for each day,” to “just write a couple of thoughts — literally, two. If more flows, great.”

I’m not trying to soap-box preach, I’m trying to say: Hear! Hear! Go read what Leo has to say.

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Switch to slow mode

Being in Fast Mode leads to constant switching, and constant busy-ness. It leads to overwork, because when do you switch it off? It leads to exhaustion, because we never give ourselves breathing room.

Learn to recognize when you’re in Fast Mode, and practice switching to Slow Mode now and then. It’s essential to doing all the things that are really important.

~ Leo Babauta from, The Brain’s Fast Mode

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The smart way to stick to habits

Sticking to a new habit isn’t easy — but if you set up your habit change smartly, you can make it stick.

~ Leo Babauta from, The Smart Way to Stick to Habits

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The mind wants comfort

[T]he mind wants comfort, and is afraid of discomfort and change. The mind is used to its comfort cocoon, and anytime we try to push beyond that comfort zone very far or for very long, the mind tries desperately to get back into the cocoon. At any cost, including our long-term health and happiness.

~ Leo Babauta from, The Lies Your Mind Tells You to Prevent Life Changes

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Overcoming instant gratification

The second way of living is the opposite: eat simple food in moderation, enjoy the Internet but with limits so that we can focus on important work, get away from TV and computers once in awhile to enjoy nature and being active and exercising, shopping less and having less possessions, finding focus and being mindful. It’s not that we don’t indulge in the treats of the first way, but we do it with a little restraint, and consciousness.

~ Leo Babauta from, A Brief Guide to Overcoming Instant Gratification

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