Wait to respond

I have often regretted acting impulsively when I am feeling angry or frustrated. Now, when I feel that familiar urge to respond defensively or say things I don’t really mean or bang out a wounded response via email or text, I wait. I force myself to breath, take a step back, and wait to respond. Just an hour or two or an overnight retreat makes a world of difference. And if all else fails, I try to obey this message I got in a fortune cookie: Avoid compulsively making things worse.

~ Debbie Millman



Of the many, many excuses people use to rationalize why they can’t do something, the excuse, “I am too busy,” is not only the most inauthentic, it is also the laziest. I don’t believe in, “too busy.” Busy is a decision. We do things we want to do, period. If we say we are too busy, it is shorthand for, “not important enough.” It means you would rather be doing something else that you consider more important.

~ Debbie Millman